Blankets for Bereavement

Baylor Scott & White program helps families experiencing pregnancy loss

By Amy Rognlie | Photos courtesy of Baylor Scott & White

Labor and delivery nurse Jenny Kayser and her husband know the anguish of experiencing an early pregnancy loss. As a longtime nurse at Baylor Scott & White Medical Center – Temple, Kayser’s mission is to help others who are experiencing this kind of devastating loss.

Kayser, a lifelong Bell County resident, is the face of the labor and delivery department’s bereavement program, which aims to compassionately care for and support mothers and their families through the processes of delivery, stages of grief, and beginning stages of coping as they move toward renewed hope after experiencing a fetal loss.

“Eighteen or 20 years ago when I went through this, no one talked about it. There were really no resources for the medical community and no one knew how to interact with a patient going through a fetal loss,” Kayser says. “I want provide our patients with what I didn’t have. Our staff tries to care for our patients as we would want care provided for us in this painful situation.”

When Kayser first became involved in the program in 2013, it was very simple. She and her fellow nurses had minimal known resources and supplies, but over the last few years with Kayser at the helm as bereavement coordinator, the program has blossomed and evolved to better support patients and their families.

One of the nurses’ most meaningful expressions of that support is to provide a hand-painted memory box to each family who has experienced a pregnancy loss. Inside the box are keepsake mementos of their baby, including hand/footprints, a lock of the baby’s hair, a handmade name bracelet or charm, a birth or “born sleeping” announcement along with handmade hats, blankets and clothing items. Kayser and her department staff hand paint each and every one of the boxes on their own time.

“This adds a special touch for these families, to know that we took time and our love to provide them with something special that they can keep forever,” Kayser says. “It’s heartwarming to see the gratitude of each family when they realize that we have spent time making a beautiful box full of memories for them.”

Whenever possible, these special nurses try to get a feel for what each family likes in order to “match” a box to them. The nurses are also on hand to take photos of the families with their babies, ensuring that a grieving family does not have to wait weeks for professional photos to arrive, but can take the precious photos of their baby home with them in their memory box.

Funding for the project is provided by the Baylor Scott & White Central Texas Foundation, which receives support from the community as well as from hospital staff, who make voluntary donations from their paychecks. The program also supports families who lost a pregnancy before 20 weeks gestation and are unable to financially afford cremation or burial.

One example of this support is the program’s annual Common Grave Memorial Service. This service is held in Temple on the last Saturday of October at Bellwood Memorial Park Cemetery, which donates a plot every year and provides an outdoor covered area with seating for the service. Kayser and her team send invitations to the family and they, in turn, can invite family and friends to celebrate the life of their baby at a graveside service coordinated by Baylor Scott & White’s pastoral care team.

Volunteers are also integral to the program’s success. Local individuals and church groups work year-round on sewing and crocheting or knitting blankets and baby hats of all sizes and styles. Kayser and her staff also work with organizations such as Angel Gowns of North Texas and Angel Wings of Sun City in Georgetown, who create tiny garments made from donated wedding dresses. The wedding dresses are deconstructed to create gowns of all sizes and wraps for even the smallest fetal losses.

In addition, the local chapter of Hope Mommies donates boxes of grief resources and provides the hope of Christ to grieving mothers through a local community of fellowship. The Baylor Scott & White labor and delivery department participates in the annual 5K Hope Mommies fundraiser, which helps this foundation continue to provide their support to Baylor Scott & White patients and the community at large.

Grief is a roller coaster of emotions and without support, many mothers and families do not know how to begin coping. The Baylor Scott & White bereavement program supports the community by providing an initial foundation of compassion, support and rapport with the patient and their family through nursing, the medical staff and pastoral care. With every step that is taken, all participants are involved in the care and decision-making.

“Our focus and goal is to make the best of a sad and heartbreaking event while making memories of happiness and gratitude without regret,” Kayser says.

HOW TO HELP
Anyone can volunteer or donate supplies to the program. “Anything and everything is much appreciated and utilized,” Jenny Kayser says. Donations can be dropped off at the receptionist’s desk in the Labor and Delivery Unit at the hospital. The program is always in need of:

• Baby hats of all sizes (sewn, crocheted or knitted)
• Blankets (sewn, crocheted or knitted) of all sizes from as small as a potholder to full-size
• Preemie size onesies or sleepers
• Blank or plain wooden boxes or photo boxes
• Plain, flat wooden shapes from the craft store (to be painted and used to decorate the boxes)
• Gently used wedding dresses, which are made into gowns or outfits of various sizes

For information on how to make a monetary donation, email CTXFoundation@BSWHealth.org.