Keep Reading Together: Why teens need time with parents too
By Johna Underwood
Parents are made aware early on of the benefits of reading to their kids. Soon-to-be parents are given books filled with pictures and textures that help babies make sense of the world. Parents of elementary children are encouraged to read together as a powerful support to students’ continued social, emotional and academic development.
Even if unfamiliar with the educational research, many adults remember their own treasured children’s books or the joy of being read to as a child.
As children mature in their education, we switch from reading to them to reading with them. But, often, as students enter middle and high school, parents stop reading with their students altogether. It is understandable. Students of this age are more interested in their peers and less interested in spending time with parents.
Parents want to support this new maturity and may withdraw from students’ academics hoping to give both more freedom and more responsibility. However, parents should continue reading with these older students.
Reading with older students has many of the same academic benefits as reading with younger children. Additionally reading together can lead to meaningful conversations with our often-aloof teenagers, creating moments for discussion of teenagers’ increasingly complex feelings on personal and social issues.
Parents might start by reading the same books students are assigned in school. Whatever your student is reading, try to pick up a copy for yourself. You might ask your student’s teacher if there is an extra copy available. Not every classroom has extra books, but teachers may know of copies available elsewhere.
At times, older students are given a choice of several different books. Discussing with your student what a book is about, whether or not it sounds interesting, and why your student chose a particular book can lead to interesting conversations about their likes, dislikes, and views on the world. If your student doesn’t have an assigned reading, consider a trip to the local bookstore or community library.
Over the summer, when older students don’t have as many academic assignments, is a great time to read together. And don’t forget about nonfiction options! Many young adult readers enjoy informative reading about topics or people of interest.
Unlike reading with younger students, you and your older student don’t necessarily have to read the book at the same time. Instead, consider setting a regular time to talk about the reading, such as over dinner, during a walk or on the way to or from school.
If finding a set time to chat simply won’t fit into your family schedule, texting or messaging can be a way to keep communicating about reading even when schedules don’t line up. And don’t worry if your student is not always into reading or is hesitant to talk about reading.
Teenagers’ lives are busy and they may want to focus on friends or other activities.
As a final note of encouragement, I’d like to share a story about a former student. When my senior English class was given a choice of novels, this student asked her father, a soldier stationed in another country, to read the book with her. They set up regular times to call and discuss the reading. As we finished the novels, the student told me that she enjoyed the book, but even more so enjoyed talking with her dad about the book. She said it made her feel she was able to talk with him on a more adult level, and she was so glad to feel more connected with him while he was away.
This is the power of continuing to read together. It provides the opportunity to feel more connected with our students.
Johna Underwood teaches English at Gatesville High School.